Thursday, December 27, 2007


Found a fun little game to pass the time at work. Strange to think I get away from work by thinking I'm a trucker but I digress

I was scammed by a deaf person

Yes you read that right, I was scammed by a deaf person.... on the phone nonetheless. Well I should say almost scammed. How is that possible you may ask? Let me elaborate.

When deaf people call somewhere they use what is called a relay system. Basically they type what they want to say to an intermediary and they repeat it back to you. System works in the reverse way of course. Its not terribly common, but common enough that everyone knows how to handle them.

This was going to be a new customer inquiring about test strips. He wanted to know what the cost would be and what he would have to do to purchase them. He then stated perhaps it would be easier to send a fax of exactly what he was looking for. I said peachy and that was that. An hour later a fax showed up saying he was looking for some Accu-Chek Advantage strips and a new meter.

He then called back and asked if I had received it and I stated I did and gave him the prices. Then he said he'd fax over all of his information and his credit card number (which I assumed was reasonable since there was a 3rd party involved) and that was that.

Few minutes later, the fax appeared. With an order for 30 cases of each of the aforementioned items. 30 cases. I looked at the bottom and it gave a credit card number.... with a note saying that if it is declined to set up a charge account and send him the bill.

Obviously this was a scam. I was duped by a fucking deaf person. A goddamn deaf person. What a kick in the nuts that is. Needless to say everyone was laughing at me. I tried to make things better by saying he's probably not deaf, but that didn't help the matter.

So I sit here, proclaiming to the world, yes I was almost scammed by a deaf person. Whoopdy do.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

A Christmas Story

A Very Walken Christmas: By Christopher Walken

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even this mouse.
For I bit off its head, and shaved off its hair,
Stuck it in Timmy’s stocking, hung from the chimney with care.

The children asleep, waiting for Santa to come,
While visions of sugar…wait…what the fuck is a sugar plum?
Grandma in her ‘kerchief, Grandpa in his cap,
Had just settled down, for a long winter’s nap.

To say “just settled in” is a bit of a mistake,
Twelve years in those chairs, they won’t soon awake.
I think they’re fun, you can move them about,
I had just put Grandpa’s cold fist in his mouth.

When out in the yard, there arose such a clatter,
I looked onto the lawn to see only bone and grey matter,
The moon lit the moisture on the new-scattered flesh,
The blood yet to freeze, you could tell it was fresh.

Then, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But eight stupid little dogs … err … tiny reindeer,
Strapped to a driverless sleigh were these fawn,
And I knew Santa’s remains were all over my lawn.

He always was a bit jolly, a little bit high,
And what’s Christmas Eve without a DWI?
I took a seat in the sleigh, between seven large bags,
Peered over the front, and read off the dogs’ tags:

“Now, Dasher! Now Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen!”
What lonely sicko names their stupid dog Vixen?
“On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!”
Your master is mangled, and surely we’ll miss him.

But Christmas goes on, with me at the reigns,
Sure beats hanging out here and cleaning up brains,
But the reindeer won’t budge, kinda makes you wonder,
If they know that I was in The goddam Deer Hunter.

“C’mon silly dogs! I know you recall,
how to dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”
That got them started, and to the house-tops they flew,
With a sleigh full of toys, and the Angel of Death too.

So to all you naughty kids, don’t ever fear,
I’m running the show, and this might be your year,
You might hear me cackle, as I swoop down like a hawk and
Howl “Merry Chris-mas to all, from your pal Santa Walken!”

Note to the little ones: Do not worry about your fat friend. There are 17 confirmed immortals in the world. I am one of them. Santa is another. He will be back next year. Hopefully he’ll lay off the sauce.

Monday, December 17, 2007

God bless Mountain Dew

Ya know I've thought for years that they put nicotine in Mountain Dew. Why you may ask? Because I, like many others, will actually crave that shit. Its not the sugar, its not the caffeine, its the actual taste of it. Like you have a mini-orgasm after you haven't had a Dew in a few days.

Alas it is finals week and I'm workin through my first 12 pack of the week. Been studyin for.... going on 14 hours so far. I have an Organic Chem and Business Law final back to back in the morning. Tack on the fact I've been slackin on my chem studying and I don't really get these reactions... and instead I'm watching SportsCenter. Gotta love college

Thursday, December 13, 2007

I. Hate. Christmas Music.

Ya know for some reason, every year, the bigwigs think its a brilliant idea to start the X-mas music on November 1st. I am convinced now that they are trying to entice us to kill ourselves.

If Santa were to walk through the door right now, I'd shove a hot curling iron up his ass. If Rudolph strolled in, I'd shoot his ass and throw him my fryin pan for dinner. If the Little Drummer-Boy walked in... well I'd drum on his goddamn head.

Part of it is the music is so damned happy. Fuck that, I don't want to hear happy shit at work. When you're pissed the last thing you wanna hear is someone saying "Ya know is SUCH a beautiful day outside." At that point you contemplate kicking them straight in the balls or ovaries (or both if possible). So as I sit on hold for someone who is bitching at me because they didn't file their insurance paperwork on time I hear "I Wish You a Merry Fucking Christmas" over the store radio and I hear the same shit on the other side of the phone.

And what the fuck is with worshipping a fat old man who gets to have random kids come and sit on his lap? Eleven months out of the year that is called a pedophile. But nooooooooo during the X-mas season its ok if some creepy old man slides down your chimney, eats all your damn cookies and fondles your little boy while he sleeps. While we're at it maybe we should glorify a rapist during Easter or maybe drug addicts during Thanksgiving.

Maybe I'm a scrooge. Maybe its because the lil drummer boy is on the radio for the 29,392nd time today. Maybe it's finals. Maybe I'm really a woman and I'm having PMS. All I know is, Fuck Santa, Fuck Rudolph, Fuck Bing Crosby and Fuck the 12 Days of Christmas. I want a beer.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Do I want to support drug use?

One of the debates we always have at work is that we sell syringes to anyone who comes into the store. Granted state law limits one pack of ten syringes at a time, but we can sell them no questions asked.

My...uh.... Grandma needs some needles for her....uh insulin. 500 cc, long, LONG needles. And she...uh... needs a lot of them cause she's real.... uh.. sick and stuff

I have always had a problem with this. I understand the reasonings behind it and really all of us are split 50/50 on it mostly, yet we still do it. The pro side states that if we give them needles it prevents the spread of HIV and blood-borne pathogens to others seeing as they won't be tempted to use dirty needles. I've always said that these are drugies and the mooch off the system, whats so bad if they get themselves a little deadly disease right?

Then the argument turns to; but these diseases are expensive to fight, which they are, and end up costing us even more money. I cannot argue this point as it is very valid. But I have a counter offer.

Don't treat them at all.

Cruel? Yes. Ethical? Maybe not. Why should we pay for the fact some heroin addict used someone's needle and now has HIV? I say is evolution. I have a hard time knowing my hard earned money goes to support people who are too damned lazy to get a job. I have an even harder time knowing we're keeping alive someone who has already thrown their life away. I thought the purpose of treating such diseases was to increase quality of life for these individuals. Why should we increase the quality of life from someone who has pissed it away themselves?

Maybe I'm an asshole. No wait, I am asshole theres no question about that. But I really don't see what's wrong with that option. We coddle people far too much in today's society. We give too much benefit of the doubt. And sometimes we should let people live in the grave they dug.

Alas I am but a wee college student who cannot do much at this moment. And for now, I shall just go with the flow because all I need is to be bitched at by management some more.

My evil little plan though? I'll just have to make sure I give them some short needles instead of the longs they so desperately need ;)

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Stomach Grumblings

Why is it whenever I am hungry at work, namely when I forgot to bring a lunch, we get a string of Depakote prescriptions?

Depakote is used namely for bi-polar disorders and/or manic depressives. The problem with being hungry and dispensing this? They smell like fuckin cotton candy. They sit on my tray and this smell overtakes my sense. It takes a lot of will power to not eat all of them in one shot. That and I'm sure they don't taste to good.

Why mention this? I had 5 Rxs in a row of Depakote this morning. And I forgot to eat breakfast. Luckily a 400 pound woman in size 4 clothes came into today and I suddenly lost the urge to eat. Strange how that works

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Another name bitch...

AstraZenica = Par

I have had to deal with this one 5 fucking times already today (and its not even noon yet) See when Toprol XL 50mg, 100mg and 200mg went generic Par got the deal to be the exclusive generic. The were initially branded AstraZenica and Par for some damn reason. Now they have decided to change the NDC, as it is only Par now, which is causing havoc on our systems. We've had to create a completely different drug file for this new NDC even though it is exactly the same as the old one seeing as insurances no longer pay for the AstraZenica branded one.

Top that off that with the fact that most of these are in our robots and... well thank god I have my Bud at home tonight.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Pick a name, stick with it

This was going to be my original bitch for today prior to our wondrous snow storm, but even after dealing with shitheads to end my day, this still irks me.

Why must a drug company have 726 aliases?

Dr. Reddy's = Par
Pliva = Sidmak = Barr
Ivax = Teva

The part that really pisses me off? For a while we'll get Pliva. Then suddenly, after 12 months, we'll start getting Barr shit. And because most of the other tech's don't know what to do if you give them a non-aqua tray (because most tray's in our company are those old aqua kind) they can't figure out its the same brand.

Its bad when they label a bottle with 21 labels stating that "This is the same drug... blah blah blah" (They add 21 of them because they're proud they know how to use an aux label) Its worse when you have a robot. See we have a SP200 by ScriptPro. Beautiful machine, makes my life much less hectic. When you have a different brand that comes in though, you have to bleed out the current cell until its empty. Except when you have a Pliva brand in and you get a bottle of Barr, Tweedle Dee will mark it as a brand change and just let it sit there. So when you are at the peak of your day, that cell will run out and you will have to fill it because Tweedle Dee is... well Tweedle Dee.

Its bad enough we get these really fuckin weird brands lately (can't think of the main one of the top of my head) I would just really like to know why they can't get their act together like Actavis and just create a whole new fucking brand. But that would be too easy wouldn't it?

Not even a snowstorm can keep the threats away...

I mentioned earlier I was stuck at work. We closed at 3:30, I didn't actually get out of the store until 6:30. We had snow in the parking lot that was waste high and most of the cars are buried. And when you drive a Monte Carlo SS that means you aren't moving a goddamn inch.

One would think that getting that much snow in one day would be the big story of the day. Alas you would be wrong as you have to remember that I am in the ghetto.

Mind you we closed at 3:30. We had someone banging on the door at 5:30 saying he needed his meds. Being the kind people we are, those of us who were left let him. First he was pissed because we wouldn't sell him any smokes. I registers were off and the only reason we let him in was because he 'needed' his meds.

"But I don't wanna fuckin walk to the gas station" he whines.

Then we tell him that one of his meds, his Albuterol Inhaler, hasn't been ok'd by the doc yet. Most likely due to the fact that the whole goddamn city had shut down. And he hadn't gotten it filled in well over a year so it obviously wasn't a necessity. Especially considering that he was going to get smokes with it.

He of course fucking flips. Say's he's gonna take his business to Wal-Mart or Walgreens because we're fucking him over by not giving him his meds and his smokes. I'm sorry bud but we let you in to be nice so you don't need smokes, and since you haven't had this filled in 18 months, we're not just gonna give you one. (Note: We had 3 seperate jail profiles for him)

"You guys are fucking assholes, you have no soul, fuck all of you" he screams. Seeing as the front door was locked (since we were closed) I had to let him out. "Fuck you" he says as he shoves me out of my way. "Have a nice night," I tell him as I lock the door.

That might not have been a good idea.

I'm not even back to plunk my ass down on my chair in the pharmacist when I hear something slamming the front door. He's back now screaming "I'm gonna get in there and kick all you're fucking asses you goddamn fucking nazis!" He then picks something up off the sidewalk and starts beating the door. "C'mon out you pussies and let me fuckin rip your goddamn heads off!"

Well I hit the old 911 on Speed-dial. I explain the situation to the woman, who was very nice by the way, and she states she'll get a squad there as soon as she can, but obviously its shitty so it may take a while. After I hang up the phone one of our clerks goes to the front and tells this fella that we had called the cops and they're on their way. Needless to say he left.

So on top of having to dig my sorry ass out of snow four times today, and take a biochem test tomorrow morning, I now have to go file another freakin' report with the police. Gotta love the ghetto. Shitty even in snowfall.

I am stuck at work

I am snowed in at work

Lord help me.

On my way across the bridge to one of our stores today, God decided to let loose a diahrea of snow. All the freeways are closed. Cell phones are down. Theres 30+ inches of snow in the parking lot. I am fucking stuck at work.

But alas I still have the internet. I have some Lortab. I have some Mountain Dew. At least I can entertain myself.

I added a timer

To count the seconds until Prez. Bushie is out of office. Gonna try to make a fancier one at some point, but I'm feel lazy right now. Makes me happy to look at it though.

Monday, December 3, 2007

The End is Near...

I'm beginning to think some professors main goal is completely destroy your soul. I mean honestly, what else could cause them to schedule their classes the way they do.

Case and point, I have a 1 Biochem test every week for six weeks. Six... Fucking.... Weeks. Every waking moment I'm constantly thinking about carbohydrates or glycolysis. Every day I dread having to go over mechanisms and pathways.

I have decided this Wednesday, after test six, I am going to find me a bar and hopefully kill a vast majority of my brain cells. I think its the only hope I have for my survival....

Eh fuck it, I'll start now. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm Budweiser...

Sunday, December 2, 2007

I wanna be stupid!

Maybe its the fact that god decided to shit 12+ inches of snow on the ground this morning. Maybe its because the inconsiderate prick who plows the alley where i park always, ALWAYS leaves a big ass pile right behind my car. Maybe its because I get to work and the computers are down. Again.

I am in one helluva a pissy mood. I have another goddamn biochem test this week and two rather large essays due by Friday. Tack on finals week coming up and I'm having the male equivalent of PMS. Which brings me to my big bitch today.

I want to be stupid. Seriously. I'll use that as an excuse for everything in life.

Got someone pregnant? Sorry, I was stupid.

Ate some toxic waste? Whoops, stupid here.

Got your dick caught in a hot tub? Stupid is as stupid does.

What got me thinking these glorious thoughts on such a morn? Our clerk today. She has worked for us for over 2 years. One would think after 2 years that you would know virtually everything, especially the basics, about your job. Sadly this was not the case. She could not figure out how to turn on and then log on to her computer terminal.

Now its not like our computers crash rarely. They're down as often as a 90 year old man's penis. So its very very common to have to reboot the computers. And yet this chick... actually I shall refer to her henceforth as Le Retard', couldn't afigure it out. Le Retard' first asked how to turn it on. Then Le Retard' asked how to log on. Then Le Retard' asked why her keys weren't working (she was pressing the wrong keys). My fucking god it was like dealing with a 6 year old. On top of that, since the computers did come back up I was fucking swamped.

And the kicker, Le Retard' is going to be a teacher. Go figure.

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Cool tidbit of knowledge

I have found Biochemistry, while a pain in the ass, to be extremely fascinating. The other day we learned how the chemistry of vision works. Since it was pretty damn cool I thought I would explain it the best I can in laymans terms.

Molecules can be connected in two different ways. One with that bulk of atoms on one side and one with the bulk on opposite sides. They are called cis and trans respectively.


How vision works is that it takes the aldehyde version of Vitamin A (Retinal) and combines it with another molecule called Opsin. This combined molecule, called Rhodopsin, is what is in the rod cells of the eyes.

When you absorb photons, i.e. look at something, it causes the one of the bonds in the Rhodopsin molecule to turn from trans to cis. It effectively is like turning a switch on and off. Maybe I'm geeky but I find it cool as hell that something that simple is what gives us the ability to see everything in our world. Ok, back to my chemistry book....