Sunday, March 23, 2008


I've never fully understood Easter. I mean I understand the religious contexts just fine, but as for all the other stuff... it seems to escape me. I mean think about it, when we're young we are essentially thought that there are chocolate bunnies who frolic through the woods laying candy eggs.

Now first off what stoner thought that a bunny should be laying eggs? A bunny's butthole is not big enough for an egg to come flyin' out, nor would it make much sense for a bunny to lay an egg. Perhaps in this case they should have picked a snake. Snakes lay eggs and are good for instilling fear into people. Why do we need this fear? Because it'll keep a child from going after a nest of eggs under the notion that there is candy inside. The snake will definitely save countless animals from senseless deaths.

Secondly why the hell do we eat chocolate bunnies? I bet ya a hundred bucks if I go outside, kill a bunny and then gut it that there will be no chocolate inside. Maybe some tasty meat, but definitely no chocolate. If they really were full of chocolate than there would be hordes of women with PMS going on perpetual bunny hunting trips.

Perhaps my mind isn't sharp enough to comprehend such things. I think the same thing at Christmas time. What other time of the year would you allow your child to sit on the lap of a strange old man in a mall? Eleven months out of the year that's considered a pedophile but near Christmas time that's considered Santa. Go figure.

Oh well, at least I'm off work today.

No comments: